People are always telling me that Social Security rules are so complicated. Actually, most of the basic rules are rather straightforward and simple. But to the extent that the program does get messy, there is a reason why that happens. It’s because life gets messy. In other words, if our lives weren’t so complicated, Social Security laws wouldn’t have to get so complicated.
For example, if we all worked for a minimum of 35 years (the number of years used to compute a Social Security benefit), and if we all retired at the same age — let’s say 62 — then everything would be so simple. The Social Security retirement calculation would be a piece of cake.
But of course, that doesn’t happen. Some of us take time off from our careers to raise a family. Some of us become disabled before reaching retirement age. Some of us die well before our senior years. Some of us choose to work well into our 70s or even 80s.
In other words, all kinds of “stuff” can happen. And there has to be a Social Security law to deal with all that stuff — with all of life’s variables.
And Social Security would really be simple if none of us ever got married. But of course, most of us do. And that leads to a whole slew of laws that deal with benefits for spouses.
And then, darn it, so many of these spouses insist on working outside the home. So we have to come up with laws that allow for the integration of one’s own Social Security benefit with spousal benefits.
And even with those spousal variables, Social Security would still be relatively simple if we all just stayed married to the same person forever. But we all know that doesn’t happen. Because something like half of all marriages end in divorce, then we’ve got to add laws dealing with benefits for divorced spouses. And then lots of those divorced people run off and get married again. So the laws get even more complicated as we have to deal with potential benefits to multiple spouses.
On top of that, many people live together as husband and wife but without bothering with all the legal stuff. In other words, they don’t get officially married. So Social Security laws have to be written to deal with common-law relationships.
Those of us who do get married tend to have one or more kids. And those kids could end up being eligible for Social Security benefits, usually if one of the parents becomes disabled or dies. And that leads to another whole slew of laws and regulations dealing with children’s eligibility for benefits. And sadly, not all of those children are born healthy and hearty. So there are laws that deal with Social Security payments for disabled children.
And surprise, surprise: Those folks who never bothered getting legally married also have children who are potentially due benefits. And laws have to be written for them.
Are you getting my drift? Life gets complicated. So Social Security rules have to get complicated to deal with — well, to deal with life!
And I haven’t even gotten to the messiest Social Security program of all — disability benefits. The program would be a piece of cake to administer if the law simply said this: “Walk into a Social Security office with a note from your doctor saying you are disabled, and disability checks will be sent your way.” Gosh, that would make the program easy. But can you imagine the potential for fraud if the rules were that simple?
So instead, the law takes a rather subjective issue (“how disabled do you have to be to qualify for disability benefits?”) and tries to make it as objective as possible through a series of rules that essentially say this: “You must have a physical or mental condition that is so severe that it will keep you from working for at least 12 months.”
And consider the fact that there are literally hundreds of potentially disabling conditions — from cancer to heart trouble to kidney issues to muscular problems to nervous conditions to mental illnesses — and on and on and on. And separate rules have to be written for each of those conditions, trying to set a benchmark for how disabled each impairment should be to qualify for disability benefits.
And on top of all those variables for retirement, spousal, childhood and disability benefits, all of us eventually die. Some of us die alone. Some of us leave a widow or widower. Some of us leave more than one widow or widower, in the person of ex-spouses. Some of us die and leave minor children. Some of us die and leave adult children who are disabled. And once again, laws have to be written to deal with all those various survivor scenarios.
As you might guess, I’ve only scratched the surface of how complicated life can be. For example, I got an email this week from a retiree who plans to live in Costa Rica for six months each year and spend the other six months in Minnesota. And he’s got a Costa Rican wife. He wants to know how his Social Security benefits will be handled, and if his wife might qualify for spousal benefits. (There are laws to deal with those issues, but that’s a topic for another column.)
And I got another email from a 62-year-old woman who has been married for 30 years, hasn’t worked much outside the home and plans to file for spousal benefits on her husband’s Social Security record. But she just learned that divorce papers for a short two-year marriage she had in the early 1980s were never officially filed. is she legally married to her current “husband,” and can she get his benefits? And guess what? Social Security laws were written for this eventuality. (Another topic for yet another future column.)
